So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
