I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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