i barfeds in our rink
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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