Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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