i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
i think i just lost a toe
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
