This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
