Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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