i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
