Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
