So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
