And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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