Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
