She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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