thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
