now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize