Having a random hookup so left but love u
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
