don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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