so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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