i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
This baby is an asshole
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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