I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
