i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
