we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Randomize