Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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