Tell her she can't have a vagina
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
