Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
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