He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
