But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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