We won't sleep together?
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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