Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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