I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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