Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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