how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
