we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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