Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
