Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
