I wish i was in the wii world.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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