So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
