ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
