So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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