in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
