he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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