i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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