I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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