Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
We need to rekindle our bromance
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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