Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
