Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
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