that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
