i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize