thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
