The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
