Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
last night I used snow as a chaser
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
